Sunday, September 12, 2010
I tried a dress on today and I looked so fat. I almost cried. I wish I was thin again. Yeah, I had no breasts but I could fit into a size 0. So shallow but I’d start starving again just to be thin. Except that I get incredibly sick if I don’t eat and my stomach is already painful enough without further damage. Every morning is hell until I eat. The medication doesn’t even work anymore. It’s disgusting. It’s depressing. When I’m off it the weight starts slipping off and I don’t even eat a third of what I eat now. Sorry, random uneasiness with my own body. The funny thing is, when I used to be a size 0 I thought I was I was enormous. If I were still a size 0 I would think I was enormous.